Kyria's journal

I have unearthed the bra and just finished beading the bra. It is a modern, sparse design but chunky beading still eats up a lot of time. I also remade the skirt so it’s back is mostly made of the patterned lycra, and the front is mainly blue. I wanted to take the patterned fabric to the front and ended up appliqueing a couple of flowers on top of the blue for a light, creative effect. Depending on my mood it looks fun and flirty, or like I have two pockets on my hips.

Another change is that I made the skirt in a larger size, by adding an extra panel in the middle back. The original plan was made with my pre-pregnancy, pre-married weight, which is roughly three sizes down. The extra panel adds another 4”/10 cm to the overall size of the skirt, and I’m glad I went that route. I am also glad that I have a lot of pictures from that time: it’s hard to believe I actually was that slender and toned.

My big plan is to wear this costume this Friday at the Raks Ava hafla (Ava Fleming, that is). I’ll be travelling to Leuven tomorrow for four days of workshops and dance fun. I am a little sad because some of the dancers I know from previous years are not coming this year. Artemisia made an evening program and she’s great at creating a safe learning environment that makes her events always a pleasure to be part of so I am very excited to do this intensive. It’s also a bit of a goodbye gift to my ‘old self’. I love dance, I will continue dancing, but it will be different with a little one in our lives. I don’t see myself going away for a week here and there because it wouldn’t be fair to E. to run off and leave him with our daughter. I also emotionally don’t want to: this nesting things is powerful stuff. And I’ll miss my baby, my husband and my home far more compared to the past.

Today during lunch break I went to the Big Bazar (the Dutch equivalent of the dollar store) and I bought matching green feathered earrings and blue bangles. With all this focus on the costume, I should not forget to actually prepare and practice my song. It’s a four minute version of Lamma Bada, from Nesma’s album. It’s absolutely stunning and I like playing around with the 10/8 rhythm. I also like the dreamy mood, because I notice how I am no longer into strong pops and locks. It’s flowing moves all the way!

Back to the costume: I’ve been working hard all evenings past week and I need to do a bit more tonight and tomorrow morning and then it’ll be ready for its debut. My frantic costuming is also a parting gift to my old life. I am making as much costumes and dance clothes now, because I don’t expect to have the energy or the time next year. I want to have something to wear in the next year that is adjustable to whatever figure/size I’ll be post pregnancy. Just because I’ll be a mum doesn’t mean I shouldn’t have nice things to wear.

A third big project is that I need to declutter in the next three months, in order to make room for family stuff. Looking at the huge amount of clothing, furniture and toys we already gathered for our little one, our house will be in constant state of chaos for the next two decades. I look forward to it as out little one is so welcome, and at the same time I need to consciously say goodbye to the way things were in order to fully embrace this new life phase.

And with that note I'll finish my post with this vieo of me dancing the moongoddess performance at 20 weeks pregnant.