Daddy issues

Pregnancy makes me think about my role as a mother and how the hell I'm going to handle it. It also kind of solidifies the role my own parents have. My mum is really excited about becoming a grandma, volunteered to babysit one day a week and wants to go shopping for baby stuff with me. We speak on the phone every other week and we meet up every other week so our bond is close.

My dad not so much.

Oh, he congratulated us and we talk every four weeks or soon the phone He politely asks how I'm doing. His girfriend is more emotionally involved and excited.

Today at work, Gerard (65, manager of our functional application management team) showed me pictures of his granddaughter that he is babysitting every Wednesday. It made me a bit sad because my dad is probably proud and happy, but he isn't as involved or interested in meeting his granddaughter as a person. And there isn't much indication going on that he likes to be involved: my aunt asked him to repaint the family highchair for me and he said he didn't have time (he is retired and has been unemployed for the past nine years). But he did have time to sand and paint a diningroom table for an acquaintance, among other things. My aunt washed his ears over that and now he is painting the chair.And I will be raving about it on every occassion I can because it is such a nice thing to do and I want to tell people nice things about my dad.

It doesn't make me as sad as it used to, because our daughter will have a caring and loving father and I have a wonderful supportive and emotional bond with E. But it does make me  little bit sad because she will meet her grandpa four times a year at birthdays and holidays and that's it.